Anger

I’m pissed off about some things. I can’t say what because I don’t want to “out” the offending parties. But at the same time I feel compelled to blog about the fact that I’m upset. (You follow me?) This is all a shame because I recall hearing a beautiful kutbah about anger just two weeks ago. But I digress…I am not the kind of person who gets angry often. Maybe I get irritable from time to time but not ANGRY. However, when I do get angry I become eerily silent. Over the years, I’ve discovered that “silent angry” makes people more uncomfortable than “going-off angry.” When a person is going off at least they’re saying what’s on their mind. With me, the offending party is like, “Am I going to be driving my car one day and discover she’s tampered with my brakes?” (Of course I would never do anything like that- insha’allah- but I know it creeps people out).

The thing is, I just need time to think about things and choose my words wisely before I say something I can never take back. I know myself and I know that’s exactly what could happen. Make no mistake, my Jamaican grandmother has told me plenty of times that my “mout’ too hot” for my own good. (Hot mouth= sharp tongue).

So here I am, pissed off and blogging to keep myself from cussing out some people. More than anything, I hate when people are disrespectful towards me. I try, no matter how much I dislike someone, to be respectful of them as fellow human beings. Can some people at least extend me the same courtesy? Mi rahtid

 

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5 responses to “Anger

  1. Salaams Sis:

    It’s a good quality for us to think before we speak. And to cultivate the art of thinking before opening the mouth.

    There is a hadith that states something like the “teeth are a prison cell for the tongue” lol.

    Insha Allah you’ll work it out and be able to communicate your needs.

  2. I think blogging out your feelings is a great idea. I find when I am angry, and I am not able to express myself verbally, I feel better when I write about it. But again…sometimes that leads to hot-headed emails…which you might want to avoid altogether. LOL.

    The offender, hopefully is attune enough to feel your cold anger, and inshallah it will resolve with some time.

  3. Charles Hassan Ali Catchings

    Salaam sister,
    When you feel better(?) I’d like for you to help with a small project. You’ll like it because you got it started. Email me after you wash off your heart. Hopefully you’ll feel better soon.

  4. Assalam-alaikam,

    I’m impressed sister, I wonder if I would have the patience to try the cold anger technique, I just explode and then feel foolish. Someone upset me recently at work because of their rudeness, I didn’t have a clue how to respond at the time. Might try this next time, except I can’t stay angry more than ten minutes at the most.

  5. Sister Seeking

    Make your breaking point your turning point!

    I applaud your ability to restrain your tongue, and your anger. I’ve learned in my life, that anger can be a healthy emotion that motivates us to change our circumstance—to make a way out of no way. Anger is not always a destructive emotion if you listen to your soul, and control your self. I know it sounds like such a corny cliché but we do give our power away when we allow others to make us angry. One virtue I have always admired and envied about the early NOI folks was their discipline. Mental discipline is something greatly lacking in the ummah today. I write this as reminder to my self first and foremost.

    Anyways, that’s my two cents.

    By the way, you’re a very beautiful sister.

    Salaam
    Sister Seeking

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