Monthly Archives: July 2009

5 Interesting Facts About Me

What are yours? Please participate. Thank you. 🙂

man_hires
Miss Manners, Judith Martin

1- I think I’m the only person in the world that doesn’t like honey. I want to gag as soon as I taste it. YUCK!

2- If I weren’t Muslim I would’ve pursued a singing career. I’ve always wanted to be the lead singer of a reggae band.

3- I’m actually quite shy. As long as you keep me talking about a subject I’m fine.

4- Every since my brother’s funeral, the smell of lilies makes me nauseous.

5- I’ve always wanted to attend a finishing school but I think I did that unofficially. I swear, my grandmother could’ve been Miss Manners.

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Unfairness/Inequality/Injustice

Lately I’ve been asking myself a question. I’ve been asking myself why when I see something happen that is wrong (for instance something that is unfair, unjust or inequitable) I can’t just “let it go” as others around me do. Why am I so very disturbed? Why do I become upset? At times I have asked myself, What is wrong with you? Why you can’t just take things in stride? Why you always have to say or do something Shahidah? UGH! Just let it go. Sometimes I feel like I’m the only one that has problem with the way an incident was handled or with the way a person was treated.

Then one day it hit me. Allah has placed something in me that does not allow me to witness injustice, unfairness or inequality and remain silent. I don’t like to be treated unfairly or with disrespect and I don’t like to see it happen to other people. I instantly feel compelled to say or do something. I can’t sit still. Obviously not everyone has this quality or if they do they may not vocalize their disagreement. I can’t help myself. Does it get me in trouble? Sometimes. Do I make enemies because of it? Sure. But I don’t care because someone has to tell the emperor that he’s wearing no clothes. I’m not rude about it though. And I think I have a pretty good idea about timing and wording. I know you can’t just say things whenever or however you’d like to. I also know when to fight the battle and when to just let something ride.

It seems like in 2009 I have been setting boundaries. One of the boundaries I’ve set is other people can’t come and impose their feelings onto me. I am no longer willing to let someone else tell me that I shouldn’t have certain feelings about an incident I witnessed (or was involved in) or that their understanding of situation is the only one. I can accept someone’s advice and maybe even their assistance in terms of helping me view a situation differently. But when it comes to the invalidation of my feelings…well, I am not accepting it. I have a right to my feelings. I’m not an irrational or unreasonable person so I don’t think someone has the right to do that to me. But I digress, the activist spirit in me resists complacency in the face of injustice. Alhamdulillah for that.

Humble Beginnings: A random thought of mine

Obama Supreme Court

As I have been watching the news coverage about supreme court justice nominee Sonia Sotomayor, I have been asking myself a few questions. These questions have persisted since the media first caught wind of her selection by President Obama and began covering it incessantly.

I wonder: how does someone who comes from such humble beginnings- raised by a single parent, grew up in the projects, diagnosed with childhood diabetes and so on- rise to become a Supreme Court Justice (because, insha’allah, she has this one in the bag). What kind of mentoring, ambition, drive, motivation and mostly certainly, help from Allah (s.w.t.) must it have taken? I am not just thinking about her though. I wonder about the Barack and Michelle Obamas, the Dr. Rameck Hunts, Dr. Sampson Davis’, Dr. George Jenkins’, or the Dr. Mae Jemisons of the world. Where does the motivation come from?

I may not be famous or have done as tremendous of a job as the aforementioned folks but I have come a long way from where I was. I grew up poor. I was around people that were addicted to using and selling drugs, prostituting, murdering one another, who placed little value on education or morality etc. As a child I remember thinking that I wanted more out of life. I had (and still have) a fire burning inside of me that pushes me forward. This fire (which is really drive and ambition) came only from Allah (s.w.t.) Is it the same fire that each of these folks have burning inside of them too? I wonder…

And what of folks who have seemingly given up? Did they lack the ambition? Did life, circumstance, self-doubt or complacency pull them down?

What do you think?

In case you haven’t seen it…

I love this commercial!

Really?

My sister, her boyfriend and I were in Walgreen’s and I happened on this little gem:

DNA

All I can say is WOW! Why go on Maury Povich when you can visit your neighborhood Walgreen’s and cop one of these babies? (No pun intended). SMH…

Not having it…

Scenario 1: Recently, my sister and I were in a very long line at one of the local restaurants. As we stood there, waiting for the woman ahead of us to finish ordering, another group of women rushed to the head of the line and looked as if they were going to cut everyone off and place their order. Immediately, I looked at my sister with raised my eyebrows. We both understood that we weren’t having such rude behavior. (We had already been in line for a good 10 minutes). I looked back at the other people in line and they looked prepared to say something as well. Fortunately, the women caught everyone’s hint and eased themselves to the back of the line.

Scenario 2: My sister and I went to a bakery (in the same food market as the aforementioned restaurant). We were in front of the glass practically salivating over the sweets. We were trying to make a decision about which item to purchase but had some questions. I tried to catch the eye of the woman who was working in the bakery but she looked right past us to an Asian woman that entered the store. The bakery employee promptly rose from her chair and proceeded to answer all of the questions the woman had. It was as if we didn’t exist. I gave my sister the raised eyebrows again. You know what I did next? Walked right out that store and took my business to another bakery in the same complex. See ya!

I don’t know if it’s just me but I’ve noticed that people are tired of taking disrespect from others. I’m not sure if the economy and the tough times has anything to do with it but tensions seem to be at an all time high. People simply aren’t having it anymore. I’m certainly not.

Here is a list of things that I’m simply not having anymore:

(1) Disrespectful behavior from others. Poor etiquette. Rudeness. Call it whatever you like but I’m tired of playing the nice, polite role while disrespectful, rude people carry on with their behavior. Tired of other people telling me I should “just ignore” the behavior. Yes, insha’allah, I will pick and choose my battles but I will also challenge some of the offensive behavior when it’s done to me.

(2) People invalidating my feelings on a matter because they haven’t had a similar experience. This happens frequently in the Muslim community. For example, a sister complains about the mistreatment of women in the community and another sister (or a group of sisters) start saying “Well, I (we) haven’t had that experience” or “That hasn’t happened to me.” (Read: it’s just you, you’re being too sensitive, it’s not that big of a deal etc.)

(3) Smooth-talking, game-playing, holier-than-thou, self-righteous brothers trying to correct me on my deen while simultaneously trying to holler.

(4) Downplaying my “fabulousness”, my level of confidence so other women won’t feel uncomfortable or intimidated by me. I am who I am and if you can’t accept it then that’s your problem!

(5) People dropping by my blog (this one or the other two) not to engage in conversation or to offer constructive criticism but to spread their negativity. Those kinds of comments will be deleted.

(5) All talk and no follow through. I’m not hearing what you’re saying anymore, I’m watching how you behave.
As the old song goes, “Action, not a bag a mouth.”

I’m done!

fed-up