Last month I attended the sentencing for the girl who killed my ex-husband. In my opinion she didn’t get very much time- 4 years and 8 months (on Criminal Vehicular Homicide). Once she serves 1/3 of her sentence she will be eligible for supervised release (parole.) Even if she received a life sentence it wouldn’t change the reality- Moussa is dead, his family is grieving and this woman was negligent. When it was her time to say something she shrugged her shoulders and said “I’m sorry, that’s all.” I couldn’t believe it! You killed someone while driving recklessly and that’s all you have to say?
Secondly, I was very disappointed because I was the only one there for Moussa while she had tons of family in the courtroom. I wondered where were all of the people who took over during the janazah, treating me like I was an intruder. I told them about the hearing. Yet, when it came down to it only myself, the victim’s advocate and the attorney for the civil case were present. Alhamdulillah, I was able to read a victim impact statement to the judge on behalf of his family in Mauritania. The civil attorney warned me that the sentencing hearing often feels like a second funeral. It really did for me. After I read the victim impact statement, I went back to my seat and out of nowhere I started sobbing uncontrollably. I don’t even know where it came from. I thought I was finished grieving. Even after I left the courtroom I felt like I was going to collapse.
So why is this post called Sad, Happy? I’m sad when I think about Moussa no longer being alive. I know this was Allah’s plan and I can fully accept that. I have no argument. At the same time the shock of it combined with the finality is what gets me. Though we didn’t make it as a couple, Moussa was still a good friend of mine and a great guy overall. The happy part is that I have remarried and I am completely satisfied with my choice this time. Mashallah, after all of the tribulation Allah has blessed me with Mr. Right For Me. (Kinda like Allah designed a husband for me).
So here I am, Sad-Happy. Life is funny that way, isn’t it?
Local coverage: here